Children are wily creatures.  Oh, they may seem all cute and cuddly, but underneath it all they’re badgers. Rabid badgers.  Who among us has not been bitten at least once by a toddler? Yeah, I rest my case.  Badgers.  The whole lot of them.

badger 300x240 BadgersVista, I suspect is a vampiric badger (they’re the worst kind).  She prefers to sleep during the day and come out at night. Which is damn inconvenient, because despite my convictions otherwise during my goth teenage-angst years, I am not a vampire.  I like to sleep.  No, screw that.  I NEED to sleep. But this little vampiric badger of mine… oh she’s smart.  Very cunning that one.  She spends a whole month lulling us into a false sense of security.

I’m sure in addition to be a vampiric badger, she also possesses some sort of strange magic.  Magic that makes us forget things.  She’ll look at me with big blue eyes and tousled blonde hair that says “Sure I’ll sleep through the night mommy.  Just watch”  And so she does.  And I think “This isn’t so bad”.  Because, you see…magic.  I forgot that just the month before we spent night after sleepless night up with her.

And then I feel silly for calling the nice people at Family Support for Children with Disabilities (FSCD). I feel silly that the nice FSCD lady came all the way to our house. And I feel silly that she approved us for respite care so we could get a break. Because the magic makes me forget. And when she sent over the contracts for us to sign, I let them sit there. Because the magic was at work. And I thought ‘I’m sleeping through the night, and this isn’t that bad. And she’s doing so well. We don’t need respite care anymore’.

But then the evil rabid vampiric badger snarls and laughs at my foolishness. Laughs at my cockiness, thinking that I, a simple mother, could handle this alone. And the sleepless nights begin again. And the agitation and aggression returns. And the screaming. Oh the screaming and the howling. Because everyone needs to know that that badger is back in town.

Take heed and be warned. And don’t forget to make sure there are tranquilizer darts in the gun… because those badgers, they’ll eat you alive.

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14 Responses to Badgers

  • Ashlee says:

    #1 I feel really bad for you guys & all your sleepless nights. I’m sorry!
    #2 That damn picture will probably haunt my dreams tonight.

  • Kristen says:

    *hugs* I’m certain you have it 100 times worse than us, but Jamison is hardly a good sleeper so I can empathize. My SIL had (and is still having) her fair sure with the first two so I would always call her when I needed to bitch. We’ve come to the conclusion that those mothers who had babies that slept through the night starting at 6-8 weeks? We can only hope their kids get into drugs or something really horrible in their teen years. I’ll probably get flamed for that, but there you go. *more hugs*
    .-= Kristen´s last blog ..To the Batcave! =-.

    Jenn Reply:

    LOL! Oh, isn’t it awful to say, but I know exactly what you mean. Mom’s who say “well have you tried…blah blah blah”. Dude! Do you see these bags under my eyes? I have tried EVERYTHING. Trust me. Yeah… people who have good sleepers shouldn’t ever be allowed to mention that fact for fear that those of us who don’t may just go postal

  • Al_Pal says:

    Rough. I hope you get a break soon!!!

  • Chase was an amazing sleeper. Jimmy? Not so much. Add that to the normal six month sleep regression, and the fact that he wakes Chase up every night,and you have a very unhappy household. I’m sorry your not getting any sleep mama, I hope you find some relief soon!
    .-= ali (adil320)´s last blog ..Follow Friday: The Blog Edition =-.

  • Oh man, that badger pic had me rolling with laughter this morning.

    I don’t know what else to say except I hope it gets better soon.

    .-= Sara @heartmychloe´s last blog ..Wordless Wednesday =-.

  • becky says:

    LOL so I think that sometimes my baby might be a vampiric badger too. Thanks for the mental image haha
    .-= becky´s last blog ..My Photography =-.

  • melissa says:

    ugh, that picture is what I feel like right now. my youngest is teething and I want to cry. I feel for you because you think they get into a sleep routine, they break it. I hope sleep is in the near future for you girlie!

  • Amanda says:

    I hate that no sleeping thing.
    I just hate it.

    I hope that princess moves her pea from her bed soon and finds her some good sleep!
    .-= Amanda´s last blog ..Project 40 Update =-.

  • i swear, if i have a fucking nightmare tonight because of that picture, i am calling your canadian ass and waking it up to sing me ever so sweetly back to sleep.

    oh yeah, and i love V.
    .-= nic @mybottlesup´s last blog ..curly blanket of love =-.

    Jenn Reply:

    LMAO! You mean you don’t see the cute cuddly resemblance between the picture and V??

  • Lu ~ @masmom says:

    Great analogy Jenn! Hahaha. I am so sorry you guys are going through this. I really hope that the new doctor can help with all of these issues for V and it will help you all. (((HUGS))
    .-= Lu ~ @masmom´s last blog ..Tendon Surgery: Take Two =-.

  • Lisa says:

    That pictures is seriously scary.

    Sorry you guys are going through this. I hope it improves soon.

    As a side note my friends use respite care for their little boy with CP. He is 5 now and has never slept well. They consider it a god send. Just a few days break and their ready to tackle anything that comes their way.
    .-= Lisa´s last blog ..Carseat Safety Regulations =-.

  • avasmommy says:

    Yeah, my sweet kid has turned into the rabid badger this week. If she keeps biting me I’m going to have to get a rabies shot.

    I have no assvice to give. Ava was a good sleeper, through no doing of our own, just dumb luck and a good baby. I’m convinced the next one will be just the opposite.

    Use the respite care. That’s what it’s there for. Gives you time to recharge so you can give her your best.


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