The Truth About Ownership

The new brand of quasi-celebrities.  Bloggers.  We put our lives out there.  Share our thoughts, our spouses, our children.  Share our highs, our lows, our successes, our failures.  Share who we went out with, who we saw, who we talked to, who we talked about.  Share where we went, where we want to be, who we want to be.

We put it all out there for complete strangers to read. And these strangers slowly become a name recognized out of the comments, an acquaintance, a friend.

We invite these people into our lives, saying look at me, this is who I am. Look and see what I stand for, what I stand against, what I won’t take sitting down.

But there is a price we ask in return.  We want love and adoration. We need support and comfort.

And the more we crave, the more people we invite, allow, entice with our writing, into our inner circle.  And as this inner circle grows and flourishes so does our power.

We become mentors, leaders, masters of our domains.

But, so it is said, with great power comes great responsibility.

With but a few words we can whip our zombie hoards into a frenzy and unleash them on some unsuspecting target.  They will do our dirty work and destroy and demolish.  Those who stand in our paths will be silenced.

Except…except…what happens when it’s not mindless zombies we unleash, but emotional beings.  Capable of rational thought.  And what happens when these people stop, amidst the chaos they help caused, and turn to look over their shoulder at the person who directed the rampage.  And what happens, when as one, they turn and bring the chaos back to our own doorstep.

As bloggers we not only need to own what we say, what we think, what we do personally, but accept the power we hold and wield.  Accept ownership, accept responsibility for those people who look to us and are willing to stand up for us.  Accept that we have the power to use this for good AND for evil and that the two are sometimes not so black and white, as much as shades of gray.  Accept that when people do things at our behest, on our behalf, we wholly own part of the responsibility for those actions.

IF we are not willing to accept and own this responsibility, then we cannot be surprised when people turn on us in anger and disappointment at our failed leadership.

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41 Responses to The Truth About Ownership

  • Anne Y says:

    WOW Jenn. WOW!
    .-= Anne Y´s last blog ..The facts about a breast lumpectomy =-.

    Jenn Reply:

    lol… is that a good ‘wow’ or a ‘holy fuck you missed the boat on this one’ wow?

    Anne Y Reply:

    That’s a good ‘wow’. Your words continue to amaze me everyday.
    .-= Anne Y´s last blog ..The facts about a breast lumpectomy =-.

  • Sharon says:

    Princess Jen you wholly deserve the title of Queen.

    Jenn Reply:

    Awwww…. you’re too sweet. Thank you

  • Unfortunately some people become adults and fail at taking responsibility for their actions or owning their behaviors. Placing blame, casting aspersions, and diverting others from your wrong doings does not change ownership.

    Your post is spot on.
    .-= Kim @ Beautiful Wreck´s last blog ..In Which I Ask The Village To Help A Friend =-.

    Jenn Reply:

    I think you’ve really pinpointed the issue with society in general these days. And we see the ripple effect from that in our Twitter lives. People don’t want to take responsibility or do anything that might make them feel the least bit uncomfortable. Sometimes, though, we need to put the big girl panties on and suck it up.

  • Susan says:

    and I will leave a comment on your blog. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you.
    .-= Susan´s last blog ..Our Walk =-.

  • PsychMamma says:

    Brilliant. Very well said, and so, so true. I love you more every day. =)
    .-= PsychMamma´s last blog ..Fighting H1N1 Naturally =-.

  • Smug Married says:

    I am very impressed here! There are so many people who never take the responsiblity for their own lives and what happens. It’s never their “fault” that their lives are the way that they are. Take my currently jailed brother – he was set up (yet totally guilty), pot should be legal anyway (but it’s not and he was still using/selling it), his life never goes the way he wants it to (he makes all his own choices). We were raised by the same parents – how is it we are so differnet???

    Jenn Reply:

    My brothers were the same way for the longest time. In with the ‘wrong’ crowd doing the wrong things. They both managed to turn their lives around, thankfully. It must frustrate you to want to help your brother but know there is nothing really you can do until he decides to help himself. (hugs)

  • Oh Jenn. Perfect. Just Perfect.
    .-= ali (adil320)´s last blog ..Lions and Tigers and Bears Oh My! =-.

  • Excellent post. Very well said. I’m going to link this up on my blog tomorrow :)
    .-= MommyGeekology´s last blog ..A General Rule =-.

    Jenn Reply:

    Awww…Thanks. I’m flattered!!

  • becky says:

    preach it. LOVE IT.
    .-= becky´s last blog ..Randomness- again =-.

  • cindy w says:

    .-= cindy w´s last blog ..a different sort of ending =-.

  • Heather says:

    And you know what, I don’t want to be anything more than what I am..and if the world can’t handle that, I ain’t makin’ crap up to make me more exciting.
    I love this, I love you…GO JENN!!!
    Own it girl…
    .-= Heather´s last blog ..Special Needs Marriage… =-.

    Jenn Reply:

    Oh, Heather. This is why I love you. Once again, you add a missing piece to the puzzle. So true. Why do people feel that they need to exaggerate, and embellish in order to make their stories more interesting? If people can’t like you for who you are, then are they really worth knowing?

  • Amanda says:

    True words like this rarely said. Thanks for saying them.
    .-= Amanda´s last blog ..Follow Friday Edition =-.

  • Avasmommy says:

    Dude. Yes. OMG. YES. People, some people, need to wake up and realize: It’s NOT all about you!!!
    .-= Avasmommy´s last blog ..Freedom Of Religion =-.

    Jenn Reply:

    It’s not? Damn. I could have sworn the world revolved around me ;-)

  • Aunt Becky says:

    Taking responsibility for one’s actions is very, very hard to do and it takes a level of self-awareness not everyone can possess. It’s a shame, really.

    People will see things how they are. Bullshit still smells like bullshit.
    .-= Aunt Becky´s last blog ..Where I Make My World My Bitch (with your help) =-.

    Jenn Reply:

    You make a great point. I assume because I’m willing to accept responsibility for who I am and what I do, that everyone will act accordingly. And that’s just not reality, unfortunately.
    It really is too bad that more people aren’t willing to take a closer look at themselves in the mirror.

  • PB and Jazz says:

    I agree with you. I agree with Jenna. The whole situation sucks but I like having something negative turn into a learning situation. Learning, reminders and life lessons are sometimes the only redeeming factors in these types of situations. I for one love the redeeming factor.

    Jenn Reply:

    There you go, making lemonade again ;-)
    You’re right, though. The way to make this whole thing worthwhile is to take a learning experience away from it. Thank you for reminding us of that.

  • Issa says:

    I kinda want to applaud you right now. Very, very well said Jenn.
    .-= Issa´s last blog ..Random Monday, the Grinch who ignored Halloween version =-.

  • Maria says:

    I think even those who have no desire to lead should probably hold themselves to certain standards. But I agree with you here.
    .-= Maria´s last blog ..gonads and strife =-.

  • Lisa says:

    So very well said. High five to you :)
    .-= Lisa´s last blog ..Fall Fun =-.

  • melissa says:

    this is the truth and you wrote it well

  • you have a way with words, my friend.

    love ya

    .-= Sara @heartmychloe´s last blog ..Why I love the Free Clinic =-.

  • This ties into my sociology class this semester, lol. Actually, right now, we’re discussing the current generations (Generation Me and the late end of Gen X) and the failure to take responsibility for their actions in the workforce. I think that this avoidance of responsibility often spills over into the personal lives all well.

    Yeah. Anyway. I really liked your post, you have a brilliant way with words.
    .-= thepsychobabble´s last blog ..Who is at Risk? =-.

    Jenn Reply:

    I would love to be a fly on the wall in your class. You must have some fascinating discussions. It really is interesting the difference in ethics between generations.

  • Ashleigh says:

    You’re wonderful and I admire you for posting this.
    .-= Ashleigh´s last blog ..Not that I like to say “I Told You So” =-.

  • Tricia (irishsamom) says:

    Thank you for putting this so succinctly Jenn. It is always very, very hard to say we are wrong, but it’s a lesson I learnt early in my life for some reason. We all screw up, we all make huge mistakes, we are human, but somehow being able to understand is always easier when there has been disclosure and honesty about the reality of a situation, not matter how badly we have screwed up. It’s a lesson I try and teach my children every day – that I make mistakes constantly, but that my leadership as their mother is to remain open and honest about that and that despite the mistakes, their well-being is my top priority and always will be. I think it takes strength and integrity to get there and for some it will never be reached, for others it is more of a lifelong process. I really, really learned from what you had to say on this subject and I appreciate your insight and honesty. It’s what I’ve liked in you from the beginning – you have an honesty that is rare and sometimes not the most popular quality in the world. Ask me, I have the same type of honesty and it pisses people off more than it anything at times, but it gives me a true sense of who I am at my centre most of the time.

    Hope this made sense, it probably didn’t. I’m so glad to get to know you these past months. :)

    Tricia :)

    Jenn Reply:

    Yes. You are sooooo right. We are all human. We are all fallible. But admitting and owning our mistakes helps not only ourselves learn from them, but other people as well. I think admitting you made a mistake is sometimes the first, biggest, and hardest step to moving past something. I know, personally, I have huge respect for people who are willing to own when they are wrong.
    I think the fact you are teaching your children this lesson says so much about you. So many children, in this day and age, waltz through life thinking their perfect and reality can be a real shock when they find out that’s not true.

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  • Mariah says:

    High Five

    The internet can become a violent toilet bowl of emotions and delusions if you let it. It takes people like you that can see between the lines and face the truth.

    Well said
    .-= Mariah´s last blog ..I may need bail money in about a week. =-.

  • Elsie says:

    Princess, thank you so much for this post. And THANK YOU for being a leader in the blogosphere by GENUINELY owning your words and accepting responsibility.

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  • AmazingGreis says:

    Brava, Jenn, Brava!!! Very well said. LOVE it.
    .-= AmazingGreis´s last blog ..Blogger Football League – Week 6 =-.

  • Jen says:

    I’m a little late coming to this. But I’m glad I got here. So well said. So true. Wish I had something more to say; I think you’ve said it all on this, though.

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